Endings, beginnings and building in public

If you have spoken to me over the last year you would have heard me speak about my dream for a salon. “Creating a space for us” has been my goal for years. I started doing hair because my mum couldn’t canerow and that was the style everyone had at school. I remember my cousin, who used to live with me, visiting on a Sunday after church. She braided half of the front and left. I was stuck. I tried to replicate her work but don’t remember if I finished. 

But I practiced every chance I got. I would sit on my bed in front of my window and used this pink plastic mirror. Or I would use my younger sister as my doll. At some point I got really good and friends would ask me, or I volunteered to do their hair. Word spread, so after school and on weekends my free time was filled picking expressions in exchange for a few pounds towards my trainer fund. This Ebuni never really saw hair as a job or career. It was her canvas and means of expression. Her art.

Through Uni and while teaching, hair was my bit on the side. A way to earn a little cash or when I resigned for the first-3rd time, a dream that wasn’t quite there yet.

In 2016 after several years of playing the Hokey cokey between teaching and hairstyling I decided to move back to London and focus on opening a salon. That year I got sicker and sicker until I could barely walk and my body was in constant pain.

I was diagnosed with an autoimmune condition called Polymyositis, which basically meant my muscles cells were dying resulting in full body weakness and fatigue. It felt like one day I was traveling the world and the next I could barely get out of bed or make it up the stairs.

We know the story doesn’t end there so I will skip a lot. As you can imagine muscle weakness and hairdressing don’t go together so I used my indefinite sick leave (read unemployment) to finally study Trichology. I had been asking the universe for some free time. I just wish I had been more specific! My days were filled with random odd jobs on Fiverr and evenings studying. It felt great to put my brain to use as my body was actively failing me.

Time passed and I adjusted more to the medication so was able to leave the house more and being eager to get back to work I started mobile styling. (In hindsight I can see just how silly this sounds but I am determined, read stubborn). I pushed my body to its absolute limit but felt so good mentally to be back doing what I loved. The traveling and standing was taking too much of a toll and I asked my regulars to start coming to me. Seemingly a great arrangement until I pulled a long piece of expression from my clothes and decided never again.

My first space only lasted a few months and was STEEP learning curve. I was working even though my body was not ready but I needed to feel useful and I hadn’t quite stepped into my role as a Trichologist. Hairdresser Ebs held on for as long as possible but my regulars will know that my offering has shrunk and shrunk as my hands and shoulders deteriorated.

I mostly kept my health struggles quiet and would limit my availability because I needed a full day of bed rest in between salon days or months off because I was having hospital treatment that meant even catching a cold could be extremely harmful.

The pandemic forced me further inside but allowed me to connect with my audience in a way that gave my body a real chance to rest. 

Curating a business that 90% of the time is absolutely vibes leaves me pinching myself. I have the privilege of working with the most amazing Black women and get to help them get the most out of their hair. The other 10% which is mostly admin and finding methods to work around my health and more recent diagnosis of ADHD, sometimes leaves me wanting to run away and start a new inconspicuous life where no one knows my name or face.

As I close this chapter and start the new one, I have been apprehensive as the prospect of building my dream salon has felt out of grasp. My word of the year last year was “ease” and I tried to make work and life as easy as possible. I have been grinding and struggling for so long and didn’t want it to continue but have been unable to see how to bring my idea to fruition.

My word this year is enjoyment. I spent my birthday on a solo trip. This was my first holiday since getting sick and I am so proud of myself for rekindling a tradition I started by spending my new year away with myself. In the final moments of my 32nd I was preparing to toast with a stranger and they ended an anecdote with the saying “nothing is impossible”

I came home not as refreshed as I would like but with a deadline. Open a salon by June, September at the latest or pack it all in and start again.

While I am the most “ready” I have ever been. I have lost the foolhardiness of my younger years and the prospect of continuing to work at this pace filled me with dread. 

Black women deserve a quality salon environment where the process is joyful. They require stylists who will treat them tenderly and remove shame or stigma. I know I can create this and have a community waiting. But I can’t do it alone and I refuse to struggle for it. 

I get anxious thinking about trying to explain when seeking investment, why I haven’t done more or made more sales but my goal has always been impact over profit. Not great business but the people always come first.

This salon is for us. When choosing the name I wanted something that embodies the feeling my clients experience without sounding cliche or tacky. 

The name I have settled on is ….. I haven’t registered it yet so let me do that before someone pulls a Claude Littner on me. When I previewed it with a few people it seemed to be a hit and brought up some other interesting feedback which I will share soon.

This evening I joined a zoom ( new methods with Sharmadean Reid) and was able to articulate my current feelings and clarify what I want. I am 100% committed to building this chain of salons but just not at the expense of myself. So I hope you will continue to join me and help shape the future of Black hair care in the UK and beyond.